Foosball….Football pregame has started. I only know because it’s all over the TV. Let this statement stand until the Superbowl…I don’t care…unless you’re serving food. Please don’t tell me about your fantasy draft team.
Finger food: I’ve been really into eating food with my fingers lately. Not just traditional fries, burgers and hot dogs…but salad and pancakes. According to a bunch of websites, this is an ancient and wonderful practice. It’s just started with me recently. If anyone has insight into my weirdness, I would be delighted.
No Elves: Someone posted on Facebook yesterday they were getting excited about Elf on a Shelf. Whoa down there, Felicity. Keep sipping that Pumpkin Spice Latte and chill.
It’s a sad day for all women….The Rock has gotten married. Not that I thought I had a chance. It was just a dream. But, congrats to him, his wife and their family.
He’s a Fattie: Monday, August 26th was International Dog Day. After I smeared photos of my two lovely but incredible lazy boys, I enjoyed a letter written by Pres. George Bush Sr. during his days in the White House that deals with his dogs new diet. Poor Ranger. Compared to a blimp.
Jimmy is the Devil – You may have seen some stuff going around last week about Jimmy John’s owner. Apparently, he is a HUGE fan of big game hunting. I don’t care if no one can prove whether or not they are illegal hunts. Elephants are wonderful, endangered creatures. They do not deserve to be hunted down for trophies. Anyone doing such is a massive A-Hole. There is a boycott of the sandwich shop and I’m in full support of it.
More knowledge for Yoooooouuuuu: Do you know why all public toilet seats are shaped like a U? They were designed that way for women. I know! I was shocked too. The thought behind the shape was to allow women to wipe without coming into contact with the seat. How thoughtful. Thank you Uniform Plumbing Code of 1973.
That’s it. That’s all. Until next week